meh. fuck.

fuck you.

unable to say how i really feel

i have lost the power to convey my emotions properly.

all i can do is cry.
Sit back and watch it all fall to shit, you piece of shit.
  • Current Music
    System - Sugar

My Joy!!!

My beautiful little girl was born on Thursday 25th of May :-)

all will never be the same again :P
  • Current Mood
    ecstatic ecstatic

(no subject)

as someone pointed out to me last night, I'm not that much of a LJ junkie when it comes to posting stuff... mainly because recently my weekends have been ruled by work...

Monday mornings come and I like coming on here to read what everyone has been up to... It proves to be quite a read.

This weekend was alike many others. I worked on Saturday and Sunday. Although I did go out on friday night (I finished work at 10 and started again at 1pm on saturday) Rach, Soph, Michael and I all went into Kings Cross Hotel. It was fun. Bloody cold though. Much drink and other things was had by some... not for those designated to be the driver home. But still I had a good time. I dont know what it is about that place but it has a good atmosphere, the people there are all pretty laid back and you dont get the pretentious wankers that you get at so many other places in the city.

We got up after minimal "sleep" on saturday morning and went for our traditional scattered/hungover breakfast down along the beach at dee why. It was rather nice. Although it was funny when Rach started freaking out because the waitress kept on asking the people next to us whether the hash was all that they forgot. LOL *thinks* it was quiet funny the look on her face.

Actually... now that i think about it I did go out after work on saturday night. It was Estelle's 21st at Pittwater RSL.. Some said it was lucky that I got there late. The party itself was alright I suppose if your into all that pop music... But what I liked was seeing all of my friends that I havent seen for AGES. Many since my birthday (i dont have all that clear memories of that night anyway) It was good to see them all again, definitely have to do a big catch up thing. Its funny I remember when every friday and saturday night we all used to go and drink somewhere, every week. Then maybe 1 or 2 people would drop out on it but as time moved on we no longer have anything like that. Not even for birthday's anymore. Hmmmm thats life I suppose :-|

I did have plans for sunday after i finished work... but then Manly lost yet again and I bought beer. Dad came to visit and had a beer with me and then they left and I continued to drink beer alone until Matt finished work and bought round Pizza and then we had a beer together..

Oh the excitement of my life :P
  • Current Music
    Caliban - Diary of an Addict


ive met a spoon... which i quite enjoy. but it is exciting - possibly naughty :-D

the unknown always is.
funny though this warm safe feeling i get.
to someone ive not ever seen.
but just his humour. his cheeky charm.

makes me smile..
he does...

AND I LIKE IT... if he only knew... *sigh*
  • Current Music
    teh infected mushy!


Melbourne is the shit.

Got back tonight... Slept majority of the drive home hahaha

Went out with some awesome people and had fun meeting the new ones :P

Saturday consisted being given the whole tourist thing of the city, was good fun... its weird to see a capital city so much smaller and under developed than sydney.. like i go into the city here and can be standing on the corner somewhere and there will be no sunshine and stuff... just shadow from all of the buildings and smog from the numerous taxis... Melb has shit all cabs in the street compared to us... But the open spaces in the CBD there is just so weird to see... Good weird.

Saturday night I went out to Switch... Had a few too many to drink but the music was go0d. I like the clubs that dont just play all that tech shit... or none at all :) Bert is tops with his DJ skills... and playing some choice picks by me! hmmm after the club I went and visited a friend... now hes cracked the shits at me for being a fake or whatever... pfft

Sunday was spent in the city again (I love it) and then went to the Markets. I bought some sunnies... hmmm they a pretty co0l. I'm sure I bought more stuff but I cant remember.

How good are the trams and stuff. I hadn't been on one before.. but think sydney should adopt this idea. Much less traffic and less taxis and less pollution and stuff.. Except for the friggin hook lanes. They suck. Whoever invented them must have been on something.

Yeh so the rest of sunday I went back to the classy Best Western Motel we stayed at... (it did have a rather comfy bed in it) hmm and slept. for like an hour whilst watching X-Men... Then Hailz came and picked me up and went back to her house for some beverages and fo0d before our BIG night out.

We went to Next, another awesome club (love it) and made use of the cheap drinks whilst they lasted. Had to have a chuck before midnight (wtf?) and then kept on drinking. Towards the end of the night I was dancing like a crazy person. After I left at like 4:40am or whatever i started to walk in what I thought was the correct direction... walked for 20mins and ended up at Federation Square... TOTALLY wrong direction. So I walked back the other way and kept on walking. This one cab I asked for a lift goes "i'm not going in that direction" then continued to drive in the direction I needed to go... fuck head. So i kept on walking.. by the time I got to the Markets this taxi with 3 guys in it stopped next to me asked if i needed a lift anywhere. They only drove me about 200 metres... but stil how nice is that? They didnt know me or whatever but still.. one of them then preceded to get out of the taxi whe I did to come home with me haha. The about 15mins later as I was walking down the Royal Parade... a guy in some old ford pulled up and asked me if I was ok... You wouldnt get shit like that in sydney... Yeh so I got back to the motel at like 6:20am. I didnt have the most appropriate shoes on for walking long distances. I got to the motel and Karl was already up and ready to go.. Waiting for me and shit.

I cant rememeber driving out the driveway to leave hahaha I was ging to drive but i would have been wayyyyy over the limit still. I tried driving at like about 1:15pm... lasted about 25mins and i couldnt concentrate. So Karl had to drive all the way home whilst I slept hehe. Then he had to go to work tonight :/

Hailz, you're fuckn awesome... cunt! :P I cant wait till I can see you again and go out again. I had the best time hanging out with you again. Hurry your sexy bitch arse up here and visit...
Jess, you are tops. We will definately be going out again.
Bert, you have some sweet arse tastes in music. When you come to Sydney... make sure they open up for one night so that we can party... Thanks for the drinks :)
Michael... If it weren't for you I wouldnt have been able to get home last night... or had as much to drink as I did :P I had the best time hanging out with you... and definately want to do it again in the near future... Thank You for everything you did for me. Much appreciated.

You Guys fucking RAWK and I cant wait to get back down there...

Hailz and I

Jess, Hailz and I

Hailz and Jess

Michael and I
ahahaha very drunken at this stage.
  • Current Music
    Atreyu - Right side of the bed


Yay im going to melbourne next week... its going to GOOD!

oooh lost is on


Go see Evolvar next thursday at 77... i think ???
  • Current Music
    Green Day - Nimrod... the whole album

i love you

RIP my favourite man... There will never be another you.

I love you so much. I always will.

You are no longer in pain anymore and that is all that matters.

Stay with me forever? xxx
  • Current Music
    Caught Fire...

so so tired

I cant sleep.
Its giving me the shits...

I dont understand why people go through phases of enjoying messaging you and talking to you on the phone and the all of a sudden they stop....

makes you feel like shit.

so thats how i am feeling right now like shit.
  • Current Music
    At The Drive In